GN'R Bus

So I was thinking. Fuck you, I was. Why the obsession with finding out everything early? It occured to me during the Superbowl. Half the commercials they showed were things I'd seen before. Isn't the whole point of watching those things to see these new, good ads? Okay, maybe not good, but hopefully funny. But they weren't new. I'd seen them. Either on some "sneak preview" TV show, or maybe online somewhere. I hadn't gone out of my way to find out that shit, but there it was. It dawned on me that we're a culture of "I must know now". We can't wait for shit! The twats tweet about shit that just happened, like anyone else wants to know. We can't wait until we talk to that person to say, "Hey, what have you been up to?" What is the matter with us?! Just wait!! You can wait!

Movie trailers! We see so many goddamned trailers nowadays. Teaser 1, teaser 2, trailer 1, trailer 2, long trailer, red band trailer, extended preview... GAH!!! Just wait until the fucking movie comes out!! Then you won't be saying "They showed all the good parts in the trailers." Bitch, you are the one who looked up all the goddamn trailers!! It's not that important! WAIT!!!

Oh! OH!! And here's another ad. First date. The guy drops the girl off afterward, with a goodnight kiss that she initiates. The pathetic stack of shit is in a goddamned panic and can't wait until talking to her again to find out what she thought. So he gets his car to check her goddamn Twitbook status! HIS CAR! They're now selling cars to us with these features because we can't- It's so stup- MotherfugaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaK!! BLAARRRRRRRRG!!! ZABLOOZACACK!!

[shakes quitely with rage]

Do we have zero patience at all? That can't be it. I'm patiently waiting to kill someone even now. And I'll continue to wait. But the only reason I can be patient about this one thing is that this person wants me to do it! In fact she dares me all the time to do the deed. So it pleases me to draw it out. Although lately she seems less hostile, and she taunts me with her hedonistic lifestyle, so maybe I should expedite things before she's actually a happy person.

So is it all about instant gratification? Maybe, but do we really need instant gratification on every goddamn thing? We don't. Do not. Fuck you, we just don't.

Am I guilty too? Hells ass yes. From Christmas presents to orgasms, I want it before I'm supposed to have it. I'm a son of a bitch! Motherfucker stickypalooza cheater! Fuck me, bus! No goddamned patience! PATIENCE! OOH YEA-YEAH!! SAY IT!! Just a little PATIEGAAAAAAACK!